Question of Quest
Today is one of the so called I-day of the month.
Once in a month, a weekend is fixed for introspective and futuristic thoughts...About Quest, professional happiness (Read: Doing what I am yearning to do all these years...), abt development of India, Reforming political and Economic system etc etc...
All this weekend, thoughts of Quest or Fire have occupied my mind.
Same old, cribs of What I want to do?
What I am doing Now?
Why am I not doing what I want?
What is the comfort zone preventing me for my journey in quest?
Is it cool 1K per day slavery and self decievement ? or
the cushion of Stability and respect in Society ? Or
Is it my Manufacturing Defect "Procrastination”?
Is it my Weak mind filled with Doubt and Self pity?
Why does this Question of Quest Stare me, whenever I am face problems while I work, and When Solutions in coding *DON’T* strike me at the first thought ?
Am I running away from challenges?
If that is the Case, How will I conquer future challenges?
Anyway by adopting this life style, who am I cheating?
To myself? My Adorable and Ever Supporting Wife?
To My Company, which is filling my coffers with out any returns?
Or to my Quest? What the hell, all this **** stuff is about?
Now that I hate (due my lack of Ability or Interest or Passion, or something like that) Normal Software Coders life style, What is my future? How long should I continue with this Guilty trauma??
The Fire is burning deep inside...
Finally, I have decided to take cudgels in my hand and fight some way out of this mess. (I am taking clue from Laks and Pills, Who left comfortable 4.5Lakhs/Annum Jobs and borrowed a 15-20 Lakhs to realize their Quest).
I have to move to Business Development division of some company. I will try to achieve this in my current company and if that isn’t possible, I will join some company as Business Development Project Trainee at least.
Regarding Finance part, I hope my every supporting Wife will help me in this audacious but passionate effort…
Miss u Laks, Pills,Sudhakar and Amar, u people can genuinely feel what I am going through at this moment …
--AUMEN
With lots Crib’s and Snob’s …
Sandeep
posted by MORHIA @ 2:38 AM
5 Comments:
Hi sandeep,
Thanks for mentioning my name. We very well understand your feelings. Its heartening to see that instead of just cribbing you r DOING something to acheive your quest.
And that is what is more satisfying...the journey part than the final destination.
See out this difficult phase and i am sure the future is yours.
Amen!
First: Sorry for not responding to any of your comments. I think i will have time from now on.
Second: Life is risky. It is as much risky as u want it to be. But remember... you have only one life, ONE SHOT.. ONE OPPORTUNITY to do what you want to do. THERE IS NO SECOND LIFE.
The choice is yours. To live life the way u define it to be, or to live life the way u think is not risky. The compromise is orgasmic happiness. In one path u get all the happiness u want to get... even if u are not economically well to do as a result of your action.. u will be happy.
The other path will make u rich, well off and may be a socially respectable man.. but there wont be happiness.
A building wont stand without the foundation. The second path leads u to a building without foundation. No matter how beautiful and rich the building looks it wont be complete without the foundation. It wont live without it. Happiness is the foundation of life. If u are getting rich or earning without happiness.. then there is no purpose in life. U are just building yourself without the basic foundation that u need. U are just building urself in thin air. and it may crumble any moment of your life.
This is where integrity comes in. It is the courage to say that I QUIT from the things that i should not do. It is the courage to say that whatever be the adverse situation in my life... i will follow my happiness.
Let me stop with two questions and a quote all meaning the same:-
If happiness was free... is it worth it?
If life was easy... is it worth it?
"When you want something, the whole Universe conspires to help you realize your desire." --Paulo Coehlo
Hi Sandeep,
The most beautifull part of life is the Journey. Every day we are constantly moving towards our destiny, It might be painfull or treacherous but still it always turns out to be joyous. I think the so called "Procrastination” as u call it is according to me "The Incubation Time" it is the time you are building yourself like an Army preparing for a War, The fire is burning within you like the fire in a volcano and rememver the growth is not linear it is exponential.and when the day come you will move faster than any one else just,Keep the Engine hot and running.
lets beat the shit out of it!!!
Sudhakar
Amar, Laks and Pills.
Thank u for ur insightful words and Moral Support.
Hope this fire,take US all HIGH very HIGH
Sandeep
that's well written sandy... yah i totally understand your situataion and that's what i call the FUBAR state.. yes we all seem to be happy in our comfort zones... but the one who question will surely go in quest of the answer...
we should be glad in the fist place to have enough capability to question everything... cos rite now i'm staying here in my hometown, no one questions here...!!! and that's really shocking to me...
and rest is bliss..
1. incubation time, as sudhakar said...
2. the courage to take up challenges
3. the ultimate journey
all the best pal... take the right step n give it a good shot...
adios
pills
Post a Comment
<< Home